Archive for May, 2010

Stupid Crime

Readers of one Polish website dedicated to police affairs have drawn up a list of the most ridiculous felonies of 2009, RIA Novosti reports.

In July in the city of Gdynia, a 26-year-old man attempted to steal a registration plaque from a car. The thief was so drunk that he failed to realize that not only was it a police car, but that there were also officers inside it.

In April, Warsaw police detained a man who had stolen a toilet roll from a restaurant, breaking a holder worth $120. According to Polish law, the thief could face up to ten years in prison.

Another stupid crime was committed in Lublin Voivodeship in March. Two young men stole 6,000 zloty (approximately $2,500) from the fund of a housing cooperative. They put the money into a plastic bag, but the bank note packs were so heavy that it ruptured. The criminals threw away the bag filled with money, taking only 300 zlotys. Police quickly tracked down the men as one of them put his home address on the bag.

Finally, a 55-year-old man facing a prison sentence attempted to hide from the authorities. The police were informed that he was living in a trailer in the suburbs of Minsk-Mazovetsky. When the cops turned up they saw a group of men drinking vodka at an improvised “table”, which in fact turned out to be the very man they were looking for.

Blonde Jokes

by Anurag Bhatia in Jokes

A blonde and a brunette are driving down the highway in a convertible. The brunette knows that she’s speeding so she asks the blonde if there’s a cop behind them. The blonde looks behind her and sees a cop and tells the brunette. The brunette then asks if his he’s got his lights on. The blonde replies “Yes…No…Yes…No…Yes…No”

A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver’s window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, “Pull over!” at the top of his lungs. “No!” the blonde yelled back, “Scarf!”

A police officer pulls over a car with a young blonde driver in it….
Cop : “Miss, this is a 65 MPH highway, why are you going so slowly?”
Blonde : “Officer, I saw a lot of signs saying 22, not 65.”
Cop : “Oh miss, that’s not the speed limit, that’s the name of the highway you’re on!”
Blonde : “Oh! Stupid me! Thanks for letting me know, Ill be more careful from now on.”
At this point the cop looks into the back seat of the car, where the passengers are shaking and white as ghosts.

Cop : “Excuse me miss, what’s wrong with your friends back there? They’re shaking something awful.”

Blonde : “Oh… We just got off of highway 119″.